Husband’s request to impregnate the wife’s sister shocks and upsets the woman struggling with infertility. A woman shared her heartbreak and disbelief in a Reddit post about the terrifying twist in their journey to conceive.
A 34-year-old Reddit user, who chose to remain anonymous, shared that she and her 37-year-old spouse have been facing difficulties conceiving. The couple opted for surrogacy and were elated when the user’s 30-year-old younger sister volunteered to carry their child.
The Reddit user’s excitement turned to disappointment when her husband’s request implied a “conventional” method of impregnating their surrogate – by having intercourse with the Reddit user’s younger sister, rather than using one of her fertilized eggs through in vitro fertilization.
While her husband argued that using the “traditional way” to impregnate their surrogate would save time and money compared to IVF, she was convinced they were financially capable of affording the treatment which can cost up to $30,000.
After being shocked and uncomfortable with her husband’s suggestion of using a “traditional” surrogacy method, she shut down the idea. She explained that she wouldn’t be able to forget how the baby was conceived if they went ahead with it. However, she claims that her husband is now accusing her of being selfish and guilting her because he has always wanted to be a father.
After sharing her experience on the Reddit community TrueOffMyChest, the woman received an outpouring of support from those who were disturbed and disgusted by her husband’s behavior.
She wrote: “My husband and I have been struggling with infertility. We’ve tried some options and right now we’re looking into surrogacy. My sister agreed to do it but my husband said he looked at how much time and money IVF would take and slowly started hinting that we take the traditional way. I was too shocked to even say anything but he acted like what he said was not even that big of a deal. He explained that it’s just a quick way for us to have a baby and spare the money and time to use later.”
According to the woman’s post, she is vehemently opposed to the idea and has ultimately decided to forgo surrogacy entirely.
“I can’t even imagine my sister’s reaction once she hears my husband’s suggestion. I’m both devastated over the fact that one, he’d even entertain having sex with my sister just because he wants the easy way, and two, if I ever agree despite feeling uncomfortable then I will always carry this memory of how the baby is conceived,” she continued.
After expressing her disapproval, the Reddit user stated that her spouse began to accuse her of lacking trust and holding responsibility for her fertility problems.
She added: “He’s now started guilting me saying I don’t trust him and saying I’m selfish for choosing to back out when he still wants to be a dad like he expected when he married me. He’s basically blaming me for my infertility issues. I feel so devastated and like my body is useless and has failed me to the point where I could expect any negative comment on it whether true on not. Emotionally and mentally… I just can’t express how I feel right now.”
The wife clarified in the comments that her sister is still completely unaware of her husband’s request.
She wrote: “I’m not planning on telling her because I won’t let it happen. I’m not even considering his suggestion and if he wants to keep saying that I’m the problem then it’s fine with me. I’ve endured so much for the past years mentally, physically, and emotionally and now it won’t be much different.”
She additionally stated that their financial readiness for surrogacy meant that monetary constraints were not an issue.
She explained: “I would like to point out that financially, we are ready. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have started exploring other options. He can be so paranoid and anxious when it comes to money but in this case he has no legitimate reason.”
After her post went viral, it garnered over 8,000 comments. While some have expressed their support for the woman, others have criticized her husband as ‘manipulative’ and ‘creepy’ and urged her to leave him.
Someone wrote: “What you and your husband need is a divorce, not a baby.”
Another added: ‘There are many ways to become a parent. But not with this guy! Right now, your lack of pregnancy is a blessing! Get out of this marriage!’
“Your husband isn’t in it for the right reasons. On top of that, he’s blaming you for not getting pregnant? This shouldn’t be a man to stay married to… Let alone have a baby with,” wrote another one.
Another commenter said: “That is a huge red flag. Like, many red flags. Can’t get much redder.” Another said: “It’s straight up abusive behavior – it’s beyond red flag.”
Some individuals argued that if the man engaged in sexual intercourse with the sister of the Reddit user and impregnated her, the newborn would be considered legally the sister’s child, not the Reddit user’s.
Another added: “This is not a surrogacy situation. This would be your sister’s and your husband’s baby and your sister would be under no legal obligation to let you adopt her child after birth. This is absolutely outlandish.”
“IVF is not the same as your husband knocking up your sister, people,” said another user.
What do you think about the husband’s request? Let us know in the comments!