Traits of a Narcissist: 3 Red Flag Phrases They Say

Discover the traits of a narcissist and three key phrases used by them in relationships. Recognize red flags and protect yourself.

The traits of a narcissist can be difficult to recognize, particularly in a romantic partner. Separating emotional ties from objective assessment is crucial for identifying and addressing harmful behaviors.

Noticing toxic behaviors in a relationship can be difficult, but it’s important. Psychologists point out specific phrases that may reveal narcissistic tendencies. Individuals in these relationships are at a higher risk for mental health issues.

Erin Leonard, a psychologist, has identified 3 red flag phrases a narcissist uses in a relationship.

“I’m sorry you feel that way”

Image by MissKarin from Pixabay

Leonard highlights the dismissive nature of this phrase: “The partner refrains from empathizing, instead labeling your feelings as ‘yours’ rather than seeking to understand.”

This is termed an ‘anti-empathetic statement’, indicating a lack of willingness to comprehend your perspective or emotions. Leonard advocates alternative means of addressing misunderstanding, such as: “I’m not sure why you’re upset but I want to understand,” or any other expression offering validation to your partner’s emotions.

“You have anger issues”

Traits of a Narcissist
Image by Sammy-Sander from Pixabay

Narcissists often become confrontational, even if they’re in the wrong, leaving their partner feeling unfairly treated.

Leonard explains: “Being unfairly attacked when you are not the one who made the mistake can be maddening. It is natural to get upset in this situation. Yet often the narcissist takes advantage of this and accuses you of being ‘out of control’.”

She concludes that, in truth, it’s the narcissist who struggles with rage and emotional control.

“You ruined it”

Traits of a Narcissist
Image by Rosy / Bad Homburg / Germany from Pixabay

The psychologist describes this behavior as an ‘attempt to induce guilt’ and notes that it could manifest through giving the silent treatment or acting as if they are ‘mortally wounded’ to amplify the severity of the situation.

“Either way, they are communicating to you that you are not allowed to confront them or express a feeling in the relationship that they do not like,” she explains.

Leonard emphasizes that open discussion is crucial for relationship health, saying, “If you are punished for attempting to address a problem, it may be your partner who is unable to work out conflict.”

What other traits of a narcissist would you list? Have you ever been with someone like that? Share your experience in the comment section below.

Written by Dadadel

Adelaida, the founder of Dadadel Creative, boasts a multifaceted background, blending expertise in software engineering, copywriting, and digital marketing. Prior to establishing her agency, she honed her skills as the former Head of the News Department at a regional media outlet, and also amassing 18 years of experience as a host. She has a penchant for sarcasm, a passion for lifestyle topics, and an undeniable love for cats.

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  1. I have always thought my man is a Narcissist. Whenever we have a disagreement, he walks out on me never letting me get my 2 cents in. He has left me so many times. But like a fool in love with him, I always took him back. The arguments are over the dumbest things to. He has never hit me or abusive that way, but he is mentally abusive. He would say things like I need help theirs something wrong with me. I always took the blame. We just broke up again for the 100th time. It’s been going on 3 weeks and I haven’t heard one word from him.I think I’m finally done this time. Enough is enough. I can’t take it anymore. My sister is encouraging me to go out and find someone else to replace him for good. So we will see how it plays out. The writing was on the wall I just didn’t want to see the truth. Thanks for your words that made me understand him better. –